A Musing Mother 6

Survival. That's what I am reaching toward. No loftier goals have I than to survive. Is the grass always greener on the other side of the fence? Is that what I will always believe? Is it human nature? Perhaps if there is at least a little discontent, we will continue to strive for something better. But as a rule, I've found that the grass on the other side of the fence is different. It was a weird summer that was filled with anticipation. I was anticipating a big change with my job. New school. New political climate. New colleagues. New students. What it turns out to be is a completely different beast, altogether. My summer was shot with the anticipation. I went through the motions of what I usually do but on a smaller level. Smaller garden although that was due to the chickens taking up half of it. Vacations where I was half present and half trying not to stress out over the anticipation. I finally met the administration the last week of July and then, with my illustrious new ...

I started my new job. My brain hurts and I'm pretty certain I have brain matter leaking from my ears. Everything is so new and I am still me. I want to dress in my standard uniform of jeans and a t-shirt but I don't work at an alternative high school anymore. I might miss that aspect almost as much as I'll miss people. Today I dressed for work in a skirt (!) and heels (!!!) and subjected myself to more torture with a computer program that is so all encompassing and humongous that there are not enough hours in the day to be trained in every aspect. In fact, it would probably take more than a couple of days. So instead of getting the necessary training, my colleagues decided to try baptism my fire and threw me to the sharks; Mothers of junior high students wanting schedule changes. * (*I changed my daughter's schedule later that day with her counselor at another school.) The first day my head hurt from willing a class to magically fit itself into a slot where it wasn'...