Skip to main content
I wonder if my friends are the best or my personal hygiene and care is slipping.

My husband grabbed my pants by the belt loop and mentioned I missed one. Again.

My female colleague announced my fly was down.

A friend told me I needed a tissue because I had something white…and pantomimed wiping her nose.

Back to my husband. He often wipes flour or whatever I’ve spilled off the front of my shirt. Quite often I can’t see anything on the front of my shirt which makes his actions suspect. But then I can hardly blame him for checking. During my last pregnancy I refused to buy maternity clothes and simply hijacked his polo shirts. I returned all of them when I was finished but he couldn’t use them. They all had stains in all three spots where I stuck out. I don’t recall him wiping flour or other foodstuff from shirts I was wearing at the time even though there is plenty of evidence I was wearing foodstuffs often.

If I were a clever girl, I would purposely pat flour on myself before he comes home. I think I just might try that tomorrow.

Comments

  1. ChristaOctober 19, 2009 at 4:17 AM

    Every single maternity shirt I own has spots on it... in all the three places I stick out too. LMBO The only clean shirts I have are the shirts I sleep in, because I'm asleep when I wear them.
    My mother is notorious for spilling something on her shirt, she hardly ever wears just a white shirt anymore because of it. So maybe it's genetic

    ReplyDelete
  2. Kristina P.October 19, 2009 at 8:16 AM

    Let us know how it goes!

    ReplyDelete
  3. shortmamaOctober 19, 2009 at 11:39 AM

    I hardly have any shirts without stains on them...and Im not prego. They are either dotted with bleach spots because Im a bit of a bleach freak around my house or there are stains from where I spill food on the "girls"

    ReplyDelete
  4. The MomOctober 19, 2009 at 12:41 PM

    Haha, same here with the husband! He thinks he is hilarious wiping "imaginary" food off my chest in public. Seriously? Does anyone fall for that?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Lisa Page RosenbergOctober 19, 2009 at 1:08 PM

    If hubby's not holding a Shout Wipe when he cleans you up, it is considered foreplay.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Trac~October 19, 2009 at 2:59 PM

    LOL can't wait to hear this story! :O)

    ReplyDelete
  7. FoursonsOctober 19, 2009 at 6:44 PM

    LOL- Too funny! I was constantly spilling when I was pregnant. Must be something ingrained in women to prepare them for the mess of children. :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. GinaOctober 19, 2009 at 9:07 PM

    Thanks for the tip....

    I'm baking furiously as I type, clouds of flour are billowing around the kitchen.

    Only two more hours till Mr B gets home!

    ReplyDelete
  9. ToniaOctober 20, 2009 at 4:13 PM

    Thanks for the comment you made as the 30th looms near. It was exactly what I needed to hear at a time when I needed to hear it.

    ReplyDelete
  10. ChiefOctober 20, 2009 at 7:43 PM

    please don't feel bad...I had my pants on backwards and my neck through the arm hole of my cami yesterday!

    ReplyDelete
  11. JanisOctober 24, 2009 at 6:51 PM

    What a hoot! My husband is exactly the same! And he is the one who wouldn't hold my hand in public when we were dating as if it were some major PDA!!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Braces!

13 year old got braces today! She also had a little helper on her.
Post a Comment
Read more

Christmas Gifts

Jill is the slice of home baked pie you long for. Her dad was a farmer. His dad was a farmer. On a hot summer day Jill would call me up to go floating down the canal or ride the slick rocks with the stream into a barely thawed pool of water. She's also the girl I called one day when I was bored and offered to drive two hours and try out this new thing called "Bungee Jumping." We did although I can't remember why . The first year after my college graduation I found myself particularly low on pride.  First of all, I was a college graduate working as a sales clerk.  Too late I discovered that a bachelors degree in sociology is equal to a high school diploma and, in some cases, a G.E.D. and got you hired at JC Penney trying to upsale with a colorful scarf.  On top of it, I'd been dumped.  It wasn't that he was the love of my life.  In fact, it was quite the opposite.  He started planning the wedding aloud and I freaked out, pointing out that we'd only bee...
17 comments
Read more

They Call Me Grace

I was nearly 8 years old when my baby sister was born. This was quite fortunate since I was well adept at reading. I was tired of my name. Nancy. So plain. The Sunday comics included a comic strip called Nancy. She hung out with her stupid little boyfriend named Russell, was very boring and cried all the time. Why would parents who love their child name her such a boring name? I assumed they had run out of originality by this point. I was, after all, their third child. There was Mike, then Suzy, after me they had Joey (short for Joanne) and finally Jene Marie. The "j" a soft French slur. It was fitting. We had a French surname. But clearly Jene Marie was their crowning glory. Do I hate for taking all the love from my parents and hogging it for herself? Of course not. She's my sister. She's my baby sister. But if I happen to feel the need to speak to her when she's at work, I always ask for her by using both names; Jene Marie (with the schwa). I don't want her...
22 comments
Read more