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How to Talk to Your Preschool Child About Sex

Act I

4 year old boy: Mom, do only grown-ups kiss and hold hands and have a baby in the oven?

Mom: Who told you about a baby in the oven?

4 year old: Does (pronounced Doos) grown-ups get babies in the oven?

Mom: There's a little more involved in getting babies in the oven than holding hands and kissing.

4 year old: What else?

Mom: Well, they have to get married and sleep in the same bed.

4 year old: What else?

Mom: It's time to go. Get in the car.

End Scene


Act II

Open scene to boy and mom in the car.

4 year old: Mom, does "baby in the oven" mean "trouble."

Mom: Absolutely.

End scene

Comments

  1. FoursonsNovember 13, 2009 at 5:59 AM

    Oh my gosh...that is HILARIOUS!~

    ReplyDelete
  2. HilloriNovember 13, 2009 at 6:06 AM

    Ha-ha! Don't be surprised to see him checking your kitchen oven for a baby.

    ReplyDelete
  3. JennaNovember 13, 2009 at 6:51 AM

    Hilarious!! Thanks for starting out my morning with a big laugh!!

    ReplyDelete
  4. RiahliNovember 13, 2009 at 7:51 AM

    Ha, ha...oh man you gotta love it! The things kids say.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Kristina P.November 13, 2009 at 8:05 AM

    Too funny!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Lisa Page RosenbergNovember 13, 2009 at 8:45 AM

    Sending Bob your way for the tutorial.

    ReplyDelete
  7. JeanieNovember 13, 2009 at 10:05 AM

    Love it!

    ReplyDelete
  8. ChiefNovember 13, 2009 at 11:02 AM

    I love you. and I love that he knew it had to mean something bad.

    ReplyDelete
  9. ChiefNovember 13, 2009 at 11:02 AM

    I love you. and I love that he knew it had to mean something bad.

    ReplyDelete
  10. shortmamaNovember 13, 2009 at 12:09 PM

    Hmmmm I wonder how long that will work?!

    ReplyDelete
  11. SandeNovember 13, 2009 at 1:23 PM

    Yes. Mustn't do those therapists out of work .... {grins and wonders how much a four year old gets the oven metaphor}

    ReplyDelete
  12. TyneNovember 13, 2009 at 3:04 PM

    That is classic! I am dreading that conversation myself.

    ReplyDelete
  13. HeidiNovember 14, 2009 at 6:15 PM

    Is that all I had to say? Man, I worked way too hard! I realized I had left one piece of info out when my son asked when he would get his period.

    ReplyDelete
  14. The MomNovember 14, 2009 at 9:33 PM

    Wow, my kids are way off! They have never even asked anything like that!

    ReplyDelete

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