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Sex, Death, and God

I don't know why I am so bothered by certain stages my children inevitably go through.  They all go through the temper tantrum phase, nose picking phase, and, my personal favorite, defecating on the carpet phase.

Yet the hardest to handle is the God phase.  Why is that, you might ask.  Perhaps I don't have clear vision of God.  I thought I did but the little rascals have blown my perception of being on a spiritual pinnacle right out of the water. Forget the birds and bees, the God phase is infinitely more difficult to explain than reproduction.  It all comes down to their obsession about death.

Where do you go when you go to heaven?  Explain all you want about harping angels, Heavenly Father and Jesus, the little tyke wants to know where you GO in a physical sense.  Describe it.  Is it a ballpark, does it have a swingset, are there potties, can you take your cat, can you still drink water or eat ice cream, get cable, take blankie, go to Disneyland...

Do they know something you don't know?  This is very disturbing.

Just to clarify, little guys don't accept vague answers.  Where is the spirit world?  Why can't I see it?  How old will I be when I die?  Will I turn into a baby when I die?  When will you die?  I'm going to be sad when you die.

And then they cry.

Stop.  Rewind.  Play.

Usually people die because their bodies are old and all used up.  I'm not going anyplace.  I'm not old and my body isn't all used up.  See?  Watch me ride my bike.  Mom is nice and healthy.  Mmmkay?

Two hours later, Grandpa drops in.

"Hey Papa!  Youre body is all used up and you're going to die!"

That's where God comes in.  I say a silent prayer and thank Him that Papa is hard of hearing.

Comments

  1. Ah, yes. The questions. Love them though. It shows the kids are thinking. I even love the rebellious stage in mid-teens when they question the existence of God and his plan for our lives. It shows they are thinking about what they believe and not just riding on our coattails.

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  2. LOl - glad Grandpa IS hard of hearing, but had he heard, he would probably laugh too.

    My 3 year old granddaughter still talks about Kasey the dog that died and can't quite figure out where he went and why......

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  3. I think this blog title is sure to draw attention today! You got all the biggies in there!

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  4. Luckily, my littles haven't asked the hard questions yet. Yet! I'm a new follower from blog frog. Nice to meet you!

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  5. Ahhhh...this made me laugh because Banden {my oldest he's almost five} has been going through this phase for a few months now! The questions get harder and harder and more confusing and I'm at a total lose at this point...I feel like an idiot. Now I just want to run screaming from the room every time he brings it up. {which is a lot and totally out of the blue} There was a while there where he would tell me at night when I tucked him in that he didn't want me to die and go to heaven because he would miss me, but that then he would get a new mom...hummm...wasn't sure how to take that one! My birthday is right around the corner and I made the mistake of telling my husband I didn't want to get older in front of Banden so he's back to talking about how you die when you get old, egads!!

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  6. My Dad died last week, and we have had LOTS of those questions around here lately...

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  7. I taught a 4 yr old class at church one time and was astonished by the hard questions they asked. Who is God's wife? Why is no one married in heaven? Why were only the Israelites God's special people in the Old Testament? Didn't He love everyone else? I was fumbling around trying to say the right things! And was thinking, um, shouldn't we just be singing Jesus Loves Me and coloring a nice picture??

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