Skip to main content

Just a Bra

I need a new bra.  I didn't think it would be very difficult.  I had a couple of hours without kids and a 30% off coupon for Kohl's.  Not to mention they had clearance galore and I have a daughter's birthday to plan.  So I perused the store, gathering all the things I thought might work before I hit the foundations department.  That's code for bra and underwear. 

I don't want anything fancy.  Basic white bra with slight padding.  Full coverage, too.  Even the boobless have something to slide out the sides.  Did I mention I'm an A cup?  Not a push up bra.  Not a polka dot bra.  Not a sports bra.  Just an every day bra.

45 minutes later, I came up with one A cup.  That's right.  One.  It was peach.  Disappointed but still elated that it was on clearance (and I still had my 30% coupon), I took my selection to check out.  Apparently, the young, pretty thing had a script and I just might have moved her off kilter. 

"Did you find everything all right?"

"No."

She looked up, startled.  "What didn't you find?"

"An A cup bra."

She took an appraising look at my chest.  "The average cup size is B and C.  We stock our store with those sizes."

"So barring an augmentation, do you have any suggestions?"

She just stared.  I glared. 

The boobless do not like to be compared.

Comments

  1. June Freaking CleaverOctober 6, 2010 at 10:30 AM

    Nice little poem at the end there. And at the other end of the size range, there's nothing, either.

    And my secrets are bigger than Victoria's - it's not easier at this end, either.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mamma ChristineOctober 6, 2010 at 10:56 AM

    I empathize. Bra shopping is ridiculous for the A crowd.

    ReplyDelete
  3. The Mecham FamilyOctober 6, 2010 at 11:08 AM

    I can't believe she said that! I love how quick witted you were to comment back! ahahahaha

    ReplyDelete
  4. Kristina P.October 6, 2010 at 11:47 AM

    Well, considering I am a large C, I had no problem with finding two new bras at Kohls last week. They really do have the best prices and selection.

    ReplyDelete
  5. AmyOctober 6, 2010 at 1:41 PM

    As soon as I saw the title and noticed the word Kohl's in the beginning I knew it was not going to end well. The lady IN the bra department in Kohl's made me cry.
    I have the opposite problem. I'm a D or DD. (Can we still be friends?)
    At least you got your discount and saved your dignity. Good on ya, mate!

    ReplyDelete
  6. RachelOctober 6, 2010 at 2:16 PM

    Oh Lord that last poem made me laugh to tears.

    Cuz I share your pain. Glad everything is "peachy" now :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. CountessLaurieOctober 6, 2010 at 7:46 PM

    yeah, the other end of the spectrum is not all peaches either... I'd trade ya, but it'd be painful for both of us.

    ReplyDelete
  8. GinaOctober 6, 2010 at 8:08 PM

    I went bra shopping this month too. I stared into the changing room mirror and wondered if there are any plastic surgeons that can move all the extra wobbly bits from where they are but shouldn't be and put them where they aren't but should be....

    ReplyDelete
  9. CrystalOctober 7, 2010 at 11:56 AM

    I hear ya sista!!! SIng it girl-I've nursed 4 and not quite sure where the boobs went! Can't find a bra to do me justice w/o spending my hubby's paycheck!!!!!

    Crystal
    http://survivingandthrivinginmom-dom.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  10. JessicaOctober 8, 2010 at 1:08 PM

    I'm a C cup, but a 32. It's impossible to find that size too. I found a 42C but nothing in a 32C. I'd like to know where all these "average" women are, because everyone I talk to have a hard time bra shopping.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Lisa Page RosenbergOctober 10, 2010 at 5:15 AM

    I'm a well padded A.
    Around here we call that a B-.

    ReplyDelete
  12. RiahliOctober 10, 2010 at 8:44 AM

    Ha! Good come back!! I HATE bra shopping, I put it off until a strap snaps or something...I always end up crying at some point in the whole ordeal. :(

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Braces!

13 year old got braces today! She also had a little helper on her.
Post a Comment
Read more

Christmas Gifts

Jill is the slice of home baked pie you long for. Her dad was a farmer. His dad was a farmer. On a hot summer day Jill would call me up to go floating down the canal or ride the slick rocks with the stream into a barely thawed pool of water. She's also the girl I called one day when I was bored and offered to drive two hours and try out this new thing called "Bungee Jumping." We did although I can't remember why . The first year after my college graduation I found myself particularly low on pride.  First of all, I was a college graduate working as a sales clerk.  Too late I discovered that a bachelors degree in sociology is equal to a high school diploma and, in some cases, a G.E.D. and got you hired at JC Penney trying to upsale with a colorful scarf.  On top of it, I'd been dumped.  It wasn't that he was the love of my life.  In fact, it was quite the opposite.  He started planning the wedding aloud and I freaked out, pointing out that we'd only bee...
17 comments
Read more

They Call Me Grace

I was nearly 8 years old when my baby sister was born. This was quite fortunate since I was well adept at reading. I was tired of my name. Nancy. So plain. The Sunday comics included a comic strip called Nancy. She hung out with her stupid little boyfriend named Russell, was very boring and cried all the time. Why would parents who love their child name her such a boring name? I assumed they had run out of originality by this point. I was, after all, their third child. There was Mike, then Suzy, after me they had Joey (short for Joanne) and finally Jene Marie. The "j" a soft French slur. It was fitting. We had a French surname. But clearly Jene Marie was their crowning glory. Do I hate for taking all the love from my parents and hogging it for herself? Of course not. She's my sister. She's my baby sister. But if I happen to feel the need to speak to her when she's at work, I always ask for her by using both names; Jene Marie (with the schwa). I don't want her...
22 comments
Read more