5:30 a.m. Get off good sofa before the man finds she's been sleeping on it or
5:30 a.m. Come in from garage or outside and keep man company while he stretches.
5:55 a.m. Man leaves. Get back on good sofa.
6:30 a.m. Hear tall girl getting breakfast. Sneak off good sofa. Be inconspicuous. It's cold outside.
7:45 a.m. Drink from cereal bowls.
7:45 - 8:05 a.m. Take every opportunity to attempt escape out front door. Don't go out back door. It's cold and fenced.
8:15 - 8:25 a.m. Torment cat until she gives up and hides under a bed.
9:15 a.m. Follow lady around the wherever she goes. Camp out in front of bathroom door while she showers. Sit by her while she folds clothes. Follow her into every room while she puts clothes away.
10:30 a.m. Lady realizes dog needs to be outside. Puts dog outside.
10:31 a.m. Take care of business.
10:32 a.m. Inspect yard. Every inch must sniff.
10:46 a.m. Run
11:15 a.m. Stop running. Inspect again.
12:00 p.m. Bark at mail truck.
2:30 - 4:00 p.m. Greet each member of family by either barking or, if already in the house, attempt escape through front door.
Sometime in late afternoon - Complete escape.
Sometime later in afternoon - Wander back home. Sleep.
Bark whenever someone comes to door. Act ferocious.
6:00 - Hear man's car coming up street. Wait attentively at door. Let man play with her. Sleep.
6:15 p.m. Curl up under tall girl's chair. Eat scraps when offered. Nibble at cat.
7:00 p.m. Be little boy's pillow.
Spend rest of evening being inconspicuous in hopes family will forget she's in the house so she can return to the good sofa.
5:30 a.m. Come in from garage or outside and keep man company while he stretches.
5:55 a.m. Man leaves. Get back on good sofa.
6:30 a.m. Hear tall girl getting breakfast. Sneak off good sofa. Be inconspicuous. It's cold outside.
7:45 a.m. Drink from cereal bowls.
7:45 - 8:05 a.m. Take every opportunity to attempt escape out front door. Don't go out back door. It's cold and fenced.
8:15 - 8:25 a.m. Torment cat until she gives up and hides under a bed.
9:15 a.m. Follow lady around the wherever she goes. Camp out in front of bathroom door while she showers. Sit by her while she folds clothes. Follow her into every room while she puts clothes away.
10:30 a.m. Lady realizes dog needs to be outside. Puts dog outside.
10:31 a.m. Take care of business.
10:32 a.m. Inspect yard. Every inch must sniff.
10:46 a.m. Run
11:15 a.m. Stop running. Inspect again.
12:00 p.m. Bark at mail truck.
2:30 - 4:00 p.m. Greet each member of family by either barking or, if already in the house, attempt escape through front door.
Sometime in late afternoon - Complete escape.
Sometime later in afternoon - Wander back home. Sleep.
Bark whenever someone comes to door. Act ferocious.
6:00 - Hear man's car coming up street. Wait attentively at door. Let man play with her. Sleep.
6:15 p.m. Curl up under tall girl's chair. Eat scraps when offered. Nibble at cat.
7:00 p.m. Be little boy's pillow.
Spend rest of evening being inconspicuous in hopes family will forget she's in the house so she can return to the good sofa.
Ah, the life. This kind of has a Racing in the Rain by Garth Stein flavor!
ReplyDeleteEspecially love the parts about the good sofa and sneaking out the front door! Sounds just like our DD2's dog!
ReplyDeleteI want to hear the cat's version. Although I am a bit behind, you may have already done that...
ReplyDeleteYep, that about sums it all up!
ReplyDeleteI think I could add in some irritating yapping just to be irritating from my dog!