Polygamy and My Narcissism

 

Cody Brown has left the state of Utah.  Law enforcement began investigations regarding his possible practice of Bigamy.  Well, duh.  

In case you missed it, TLC has been filming Cody and his four wives for a season.  Truthfully, he isn't legally practicing polygamy.  It's more like, in the eyes of the law, he has a wife who has accepted three of his girlfriends into her life and agreed that it's okay for him to have children with them and live in their house, albeit somewhat separated.  They are spiritually wed and living in relative harmony.  No child brides.  The children attend public school along with the polygamist school in a nearby town.  That part is all legal.  And fascinating to non-Mormons.

HBO airs a show called "Big Love."  One fictional man living in Salt Lake City, practicing polygamy and belonging to a church that shot off the mainstream Mormon a few generations ago.  Again, another big winner for those who are fascinated.  Mostly non-Mormons.  

I don't begrudge the man who wants to live the way he does and the four women who believe in this way of life but I never EVER want this practice to become legal.  This leads me to Prop. 8.

I know I'll catch flack even mentioning this hot button issue but I think it is important clarify why I am a strong supporter of Prop 8.  You've heard the whiners.  Mormons hate gays.  Then there's the rhetoric.  God loves all of his children.  Here's the honest to goodness truth.  I don't care. 

Just to clarify the details of Prop 8, it states, "Only marriage between a man and a woman is valid or recognized in California."  That's it.  That one little sentence is what all the fuss is about.  The gay people heard, "You can't get married because you are less than human."  And then all hell broke loose.  

So how does this relate to Cody Brown, you might ask?  Prop 8 states the couple as singular individuals (redundant, I know).  Just in case you didn't know this, polygamy to Mormons is like the creepy uncle living in our basement.  Most likely, if you look far enough back, you will find polygamy in our ancestry.  It is far too real for us to ignore.  We never want that creepy uncle to be accepted into society.  He gives us the eebie jeebies.

The reason for polygamy in the Old Testament was to mostly raise up a righteous generation.  Let's be honest, too.  Even in a prophet's house/tent, the wives and concubines struggled with getting along.  Look at Jacob/Israel.  

In case I haven't been clear, I am not altruistic.  The world revolves around me.  Hypothetically speaking, let's say we legalize same sex marriage.  Unless I missed something in Biology, it still takes X and Y to make a baby.  Bill and Jim will never be able to make a baby.  They may be able to raise a baby but that's not the point.  You need a baby in order to raise a child.  Anybody who has entered the adoption game knows that babies are not easy to come by.  Worst case scenario (and I'm always about worst case scenario - Hello?  Neurotic, people!) the population of the United States shrinks due to attrition.  The Super Power lacks punch because we're not replacing ourselves with children.  So then we substitute the marriage definition to include a man and women in an effort to repopulate.

Enter Britni.  Britni spells her name by dotting her "i" with a star or heart. Or Ashli, Mackenzie or whatever name is the flavor of the month. Britni is young and perky.  Britni wants to marry someone established.  Okay, so I'm finished producing fruit of my womb.  My womb is retired.  But Britni clearly has much to offer and she's making moon eyes at my husband.  The civic duty is to produce righteous spawn.  Hubby's pretty righteous and he has fantastic taste in women.  

Argue all you want about my logic but bottom line is that Prop 8 has nothing to do with the gay community.  It's all about me.  And creepy Uncle Cody.  And I am none to keen to share my husband. Go ahead.  Judge me.