Yellowstone Bear World

While the masses of Utah school children headed south to Disneyland, the Taylor household went north.

This is the way a 6 year old spells Yellowstone with Quirkle tiles. That's Yelosdon.

 I don't mind admitting it's a little tourist-y but not so much in October. Like I said, the masses were at Disneyland.

 While we were making our children stick their heads into cut-out animal murals. But wait. There's more.

A petting zoo where, for the price of a quarter, you could buy pellets of food (I hope that's what it was) and be mauled by previously assumed wildlife.

After a good mauling, there is a drive through the "wild animal" sanctuary. This is where our first leg consisted of bison, deer, elk, and a few goats. I will spare you the pictures of the elk butts for another day and in a more natural atmosphere. For now, I will introduce you to Billy

The ever-so-helpful "park ranger," as designated by her bright red sweatshirt, informed me that one of the turns I took on the drive was for service vehicle access only. Although I am constantly at the beck and call of the service of the people in my household, my van does not qualify. I would have thanked Wendy, the park ranger, had a more pressing matter not come to my attention.

"Were you just talking to that buffalo?" I asked Wendy.

"He's a bison, actually," she unabashedly replied. "And his name is Billy."

"Does Billy talk back to you," I continued.

"Actually, Bridger and Bridgette are more interactive. They stand at the fence and wave at me sometimes."

I could only raise one eyebrow in question. "They're the grizzlies," she explained.

Of course. I think this girl might need to get out a little more.

With a more officious tone, Wendy informed us to keep our hands, feet and heads in the vehicle at all times. Keep the windows rolled up. Do not back up. Do not stop. This will prevent a bear from climbing on the vehicle which may result in vehicular or bodily harm. What Wendy neglected to explain is what happens when a bear wants to play chicken. 

He's in the road. Do I stop? Wendy told me not to. Do I trust a girl who claims to have conversations with bison and grizzlies? What if this black bear doesn't move? What if he comes right for us?

And that's what happens when you play Chicken with a bear.  Maybe next time he'll wave, too.