Skip to main content

Oh, Deer Texting

Between Dad and Daughter:

Oh deer, how r u doing, dear?

Better than the deer :) I tried to think of a good pun to respond with, but all I could come up with is that I just came from seminary so I'm feeling all mushy.

Buck up, it won't cost too much doe

You're better at this 'game' than me.

That's not what I herd.

Mom and I took the car to a car wash. It cost twelve bucks.

Did you get the underside sprayed?

Yep. And a banana bath. My car smells like bananas now instead of deer guts.

Twelve bucks is not bad. You're made of doe, after all.

When she came home from school to give a recounting of the experience, she started by telling me that 1. It was mostly dead, anyway and 2. There's a reason she has a Class B restriction on her license.

Additional benefits of having deer guts on your undercarriage is that teenage boys flock to your side with hero worship and ask if you will show them the underside of your car.

I'm not really sure why, but that last sentence leaves me extremely concerned. I'm hoping it's just my own wording.

Comments

  1. RachelJanuary 23, 2013 at 5:57 PM

    Oh deer. That story must have been truly disturbing to live through in the first person.

    My own was traumatic:

    http://www.onceuponamiracle.com/2010/03/true-story-tuesday-visually-challenged.html

    But the boys getting all excited about seeing deer offal... ick!

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

How To Be A Dedicated Neurotic

Going through old files from graduate school, I found an invaluable pamphlet. Be a Dedicated Neurotic Remember the Past. . . and Regret it. Abhor the Present. Dread the Future. 1. Become preoccupied with the body, and make a long list of symptoms. Make them sound very clinical and professional... 2. BLAME your boss, your spouse, your partner, your neighbor, your kid. THEY are responsible for your miseries. 3. Feel trapped. You couldn't possibly declare your own independence without hurting someone's feelings. 4. Overeat. Rationalize and eat! Eat an insulated wall around yourself. Diet for a few days and say it doesn't work for you. 5. Self-pity. No matter what, feel sorry for yourself. Agonize over things about which no one cares. 6. Don't ever try. That way nobody can really accuse you of failure. You can always say, "But I could have done it." 7. Stress how shy you are. Insist that the world must come to you. You're special. 8. Your agg...
11 comments
Read more

Pioneer Trek

Utah was founded by the Mormon pioneers in 1847 after enduring unimaginable losses and seeking a place of peace. July 24th marks the anniversary that the first wagon trains arrived in the Salt Lake Valley. Their numbers were greatly diminished by crossing the country in wagons and handcarts, dying of scurvy, tuberculous, malaria, starvation, unidentified fevers, and freezing to death. This, they found preferable to facing the extermination order put forth by Governor Boggs of Missouri. I believe this is the most courageous act of faith - to leave all they had that was familiar and travel the rough terrain in the unknown in search of a place where they could worship in peace. My daughters left this morning for a small re-creation of what the pioneers experienced. I don't love the idea since I know so many of the pioneers died but it is a way for many of the youth to connect to their ancestors and understand what many of the early members endured for their faith. The youth were asked...
5 comments
Read more

Public Notice

Dear friends, neighbors, enemies, and people I don't know: Understand that it all started out very innocently. I planned my garden carefully. Everything had a place and plenty of room. Within my planning, I included three spaghetti squash plants, two yellow squash and two zucchini. Out of the 7 plants, two came up and they weren't my beloved spaghetti squash. This year we have added two grow boxes to the south side of the house. One of which we brought in a garden mix of soil and I planted neat little rows of seeds. The other was left untouched. All I saw was dirt. So I started pushing squash seeds into it. I don't even know what kind they are. When they came up, I transplanted them so they would have room to grow. I also noticed I had two squash plants (pumpkins, perhaps?) growing in the main garden that I hadn't planted. Apparently, I had also dropped a seed in the dirt outside the grow boxes and it's coming up as a squash plant, too. Last count, I hav...
9 comments
Read more