It’s Going to Be a Long Year

While at work, I ran into a woman that works with my sister, also a school counselor. My sister just had her fourth baby, a beautiful baby boy, 2 weeks ago. I grabbed my phone to show her a photo. He's still covered in slime and cute as a button. I'm a proud aunt. Next year's assistant principal is standing nearby and peeking over my shoulder. I hand him my phone so he can admire my nephew.  The moment my hand released the phone is the moment I realize that the image is mostly baby Easton but a little bit of my sister's boob. I panicked. I made a screeching sound and hit my soon-to-be boss’s hand. My cell phone flew in the air, made a hard landing on the carpet and battery popped out just for good measure. It seemed like it all happened in slow motion. But then I look up from my battered phone to the face of my soon to be boss. His expression was incredulous and his face said, “You crazy woman. What WAS THAT?!” Telling the truth wasn’t even an option. I panicked and yelled the first thing that came to mind. “Tourette’s!” 

Did he buy it? I don’t know it doesn’t matter. I had no good “out” in this situation. I’m either the lady showing my pornographic images of her sister (Easton was breastfeeding) or I have Tourette’s. And that is how my new boss will see me. This should be interesting. And mortifying.