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The Neighbor

We have new neighbors. I really hadn't met them yet but Scott had. They have four children ages 8, 6, 4, and 2. My 7 year old is in heaven.

Yesterday the 6 and 4 year old came over to play. After awhile the father, Travis, came to check on them. "Is Hayley here?" he asked. "Was she invited or did she just come over?" I was sitting in the living room so he couldn't see me but my 12 year old son gave the appropriate answers. Yes, Hayley was invited. In truth, I have no idea. In truth, I don't care. Come one, come all.

An hour later Travis showed up again. This time I answered the door and he got his first exposure to me.

"Hi. I'm Travis. James' dad. We're going out to eat now."

"Okay," I answered.

Pause.

"We're taking everybody to Olive Garden," he continued.

"Sounds great," I countered.

Pause.

"Not to be rude or anything but why are telling me this? Oh! Are you inviting me? Great! I'll go grab my shoes!"

Travis looked surprised and slightly uncomfortable. Fortunately, Scott came to the rescue. "The kids are downstairs. Nancy will go get them." I will? Oh. I will.

I returned to overhear Travis telling Scott what a nice neighborhood we have. "We're thinking we're going to put our roots down here but we really need to step up our game. It seems that everybody's pretty high quality around here. We're from rather rough stock," he admitted.

I jumped in. "Yes, everybody here really is pretty high quality." Beat. "By the way, I have a twin sister who lives here. Sometimes she chases the dog down the street, swearing. She's a little rough around the edges."

Travis looked a little confused and wary. Again, Scott came to the rescue. "Hey, your wife is backing out of the driveway. Have fun at Olive Garden!"

People just don't get me.

Comments

  1. KimMay 11, 2012 at 9:59 AM

    I'm sure he was awed by your very presence, and was struck dumb by your wise, albeit snarky, comments.

    Baby steps...you'll teach that guy dry wit in no time.

    ReplyDelete
  2. SandyMay 11, 2012 at 11:07 AM

    You will grow on them. It took me a while to get used to a butt pinch at work. But, I soon grew to expect it. I haven't had a Nancy pinch in years. What's wrong? You don't find me sexy anymore?

    ReplyDelete
  3. RachelMay 12, 2012 at 9:13 AM

    LOL - we are THOSE neighbors :) And your comments are hilarious!

    ReplyDelete
  4. JoanMay 12, 2012 at 11:55 AM

    Oh Nancy you are a hoot!! So glad you are in the neighborhood. Poor
    Travis. He will learn in time.

    ReplyDelete
  5. FlowaPowaMay 28, 2012 at 10:51 AM

    LOL. but your husband does. he seems to rescue you often. hahahaha. love it!

    ReplyDelete
  6. MOM/SUSANJune 5, 2012 at 3:29 PM

    You may never go back and read this, but......................OK, I'm back--had to grab a tissue to wipe my eyes which were so full of laughing tears I couldn't see my monitor--just wanted you to know that I felt like I was in the room while you were meeting and conversing with Travis. Loved it. Loved it a lot. Laughed hard because I could just see it. You are a master at painting pictures with the written word. I hope you do read this, because I want you to know that.

    ReplyDelete
  7. A Musing MotherJune 5, 2012 at 6:26 PM

    Susan

    I read all the comments. Because I am shallow and need the validation. Still, poor Travis.

    ReplyDelete

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